It's A Girl!

Rachel and Adrian are expecting a new baby girl in August. 

Daytona Beach - Summer 2015

I've been cleaning up my blog posts and came across this. I don't know why it was never posted, but I can't wait to get back to the beach! It will be interesting to see how the beach looks after the hurricane.

A most familiar, but loved view for our family.

Abigail and Lydia

Sarah, always ready with a camera.

Sitting in the waves with this sweetie was absolute joy!

Adrian, Lydia, Hannah and Sarah spent a lot of time on the boogie boards. 

Abigail and Susannah loved playing together and had a great time!

We take almost all of our food and we LOVE Rachel's homemade cinnamon rolls.

It took Josiah most of the time that he was there but he finally learned to love the beach. 

It's Not Cliche'

Philippians 4:13 "I can do all things through him who strengthens me."

My sweet friend Natalie just gave birth to her fifth baby. (The baby is absolutely beautiful, named after Natalie's best friend, Sarah Michelle, who died last year from cancer.)

But the point of this isn't about her newest great joy. It's about my failure to do as God leads me.

During her labor, the verse that I kept thinking of to pray for Natalie was Philippians 4:13. I kept praying that God would give her strength through her faith in Him. I didn't text the verse to her because it seemed so cliche'. Of course, that's what everyone would say. But the thing about it - It's a great verse! 

Recently, I read the passage that was leading up to this verse. It's all about Paul telling the Philippians how he is able to survive all that he went through to share the gospel.  And then he explains how God will give others the strength to do what they need to do.

Philippians 4:19 "And my God will supply every need of yours according to his riches in glory in Christ Jesus."

God gives us the strength that we need to do all of the things that he calls us to do.

Too often our "Pinterest" society takes one verse here and there to use haphazardly.  We don't get to fully enjoy the context because it's thrown around too easily. This is a reminder to me to use the Word of God carefully, but also not to neglect sharing it with others. It's not cliche' to give out God's Word.

Normandy Inn of Winshape Retreat Center

As I write, Ray and I are at a pastor's and wives marriage enrichment retreat. What a joy! We've been here before and have always enjoyed it.

Ladies, take your husbands away. We live in a society with so many distractions. You could rattle off twenty things right now that are vying for your attention, anything that could separate you and your husband.

Date nights are vital! Go out or stay in, often, even weekly if any way possible. It's not uncommon for Ray and me to go out every week. Our girls think that all we do is go on dates, but that's okay. I want them to understand that my marriage comes first. That message isn't always conveyed as clearly as it should be, but that's my desire.

Marriage retreats, conferences, getaways, etc. are also important to you as a couple. When you block out a certain amount of time that says, "this is all for you," good things can happen.
You can remember why got married again.

• Learn to be friends again.
• Listen more carefully.
• Resolve an issue.
• Actually sleep.
• Talk without interruption.

We highly recommend the Winshape Retreats, but realize the cost of something like that isn't possible. It's worth any investment that's possible to get away. There are so many creative ways to save money by camping, house swapping with a couple in another location, etc. You can even turn your own home into a retreat center by being creative (cut off Internet, fill it with candles, get all take out food, anything you wouldn't normally do). The key is to make it a top priority, then make the plans.

Planning can be difficult. Young children don't understand that daddy should have a higher priority on mommy's time. But when parents love each other and have a great relationship, children benefit tremendously. Swapping babysitting duties with another family, grandparents or other couples who don't have children but would love to test out yours (hehe) are all great options for babysitting.

The time should be structured AND unstructured. If you go to a conference, the time is set for you. But you should set a schedule or some sort of ground rules for yourselves. What are you going to do with the time that isn't involved in a conference class? Talk to each other about what you would like to see happen, then write it down and make it happen.
Ideas on free time could be:

• Play games
• Take a tour
• Cook together
• Take walks
• Play a sport
• Read a book
• Memorize a passage of scripture
• Sleep
• Pick a topic of interest and learn something new 
• Watch a marriage conference

Be creative! Whatever you do, make the time count. Sometimes, we're so busy working or entertaining ourselves to death that we don't realize that we haven't even kissed our husbands for the entire day. 

Ray and I try to carve out at least one overnight per year away from home. Sometimes we even get to do more than that. It's that important! We can come up with as many excuses as anyone that I know that we don't have the time or money to get away. But it's too important not to.

Good Medicine

Susannah

One of the hardest things about being laid up is that I wasn't able to  hold these sweet babies. Rachel has been so good to bring them to see me and make sure they didn't climb on me. But that's also been one of the best things.  Nothing makes me feel better than to see those smiles and hear those giggles. God has been kind to give me healing and I am much better. Some days, I wonder if I'll ever be "back to normal."

I have a learned a few things -

• God will lay me down to rest.
• It's easy to pray when you can't do anything but lay on your back.
• The housework will wait, but the piles are getting gigantic!
• I have no patience, at all.

Josiah

• Josiah is better at the spirometer than I am. I was supposed to blow in it about six times a day. I may have tried it twice.

• I really like holding hands.

Abigail and "Just Plain Elephant"

• It's time for Abigail and "Just Plain Elephant" to move back tho their own bed.

Pacemaker

After many trips back and forth to the doctor and hospital in May and June, my mom got a pacemaker put in. She is feeling much better and back to working full time. (By the way, she's seventy-four.)

On one of my trips, I got to visit with my Aunt Anne who lives in a nursing home. She  and my other aunts played key rolls in my early childhood memories. It's sweet to see these two sisters interacting, knowing all that they've been through in their lives.

During a Saturday afternoon visit, Papa got to play with the babies.

I spent too much time reading magazines, eating candy and watching Food Network and learned that the people in Macon are friendlier than I remembered.

Happy Birthday, Sarah!

Well.... Happy Belated Birthday Sarah!

I made this cake on the actual day of Sarah's birthday and took it to church. Yes, just like that! It fell apart, I didn't make enough icing to cover it and I didn't have time to fix any of the problems with it. Sarah thought it tasted good and there was enough caffeine in it to keep me awake for a big portion of the night.

Wherever she goes and however she gets there, she will always be "Sarahshine." She actually turned twenty, but since she didn't really want to, I had "19" put on the store bought cookie cake. (Which is what she requested, by the way.)

We celebrated the day after with homemade Chinese food and some good photo opportunities. 

Hannah and Mary

Abigail, Josiah and Susannah

Susannah has been really sick this week, so she didn't get to participate as much as usual.

What a Slumber Party!

Because the weather was unusually brutal to power lines this past week, several families found themselves in very cold houses.  The temperature inside the homes of those with no power dipped below freezing. Our family had the privilege of hosting several of those families. With a total of twenty-one here at one time, every bed and sofa was completely full. What a blessing it was to sit and talk, play games, eat together and basically slow down life.

I know that in God's plan we all needed the rest. I just wish we had another week so that I could redeem the time better. My "busy" nature can think of so many things that would have been wise to do with a house full of guests.

All of the girls enjoyed snuggling with the babies. Josh and Natalie were able to sneak in a short date night  while they were here waiting on their power to be restored.

Josiah did not sleep well away from home, therefore, Rachel did not sleep well this week. Rachel, Adrian, Susannah and Josiah piled in Mary's room for the week.

Our fuzziest guest was a real treat!  Gus is a Golden Doodle who was so well trained and almost convinced us that  we need another dog. He belongs to the Morrison family who took Lydia and Abigail's room.

We took a selfie after all of the little ones went to bed to commemorate this event. Blake, who shared his birthday with us this week, bunked in Ray's office.

The children all played so well together and seemed to really enjoy the time together. Abigail is going to miss having all of her friends here all of the time.

Being surrounded by babies was an especially good treat for me. Lizbeth is the youngest of the O'Neil family who occupied the basement.

Overheard

My knitter friends will find this either hilarious or very offensive.

We used to keep a quote calendar to write down all of the funny things that were said so that we could remember those funny things. Then at the end of the year we would print it and laugh every day at the crazy things our girls would say. Today, I started it again, because Rachel was on such a roll.


Can you go check to make sure Josiah is breathing, I can't stop knitting?

I stopped the other project because I couldn't figure out what it was.

Mary, can you come roll this yarn?

Well, at least I know it's some kind of goat's hair yarn.

I feel like a lazy bum. Is this what all knitter's feel like, lazy bums?

Proverbs 17:22 "A joyful heart is good medicine..."

A Comfort To Me

This is from Rachel's Facebook post this week. I see a strong Godly response to grief. 

"If you had asked us last Monday what this Monday would look like, we would have said that our bathroom would be remodeled, Susannah would be potty trained, our babies would be healthy, and we would be anticipating a healthy first check-up with the midwife next week. None of our plans have worked out the way we thought. But, all of God's plans went exactly as he wanted. "Our God is in the heavens; he does all that he pleases." Psalm 115:3
"Who has spoken and it came to pass, unless the Lord has commanded it? Is it not from the mouth of the Most High that good and bad come?" Lamentations 3:37-38

These verses would not be comforting to us, except that we know that "The steadfast love of the LORD never ceases; his mercies never come to an end; they are new every morning; great is your faithfulness." 

So our babies are sick, our bathroom is torn apart, Susannah isn't potty trained, and the most sad of all, we never get to hold our third baby until we get to heaven. Our hearts are aching, the pain is still strong. At the same time, we are not shaken. God is our refuge and we know that he is in control. No amount of faith, no planning on our part could keep our baby alive. God's plan cannot be thwarted. He is sovereign, and he is good. That is comforting. 

We appreciate the many prayers and kind words we have received so far. Thank you all. As you continue to pray, know that we are still hurting and will always miss our baby, but we are ok, because we are resting in Christ and striving to be occupied with joy."

These words make this mother's heart glad. To know that my children are walking with the Lord is something to rejoice about (2 John 4).  If your children do not walk with God, how can they handle loss? What hope is there in any life without Christ?

The picture above is Rachel's rocking chair that was given to her when she was a baby and a blanket that she and Adrian knitted the day after they found out about their loss. It will always be a tangible thing to hold while she waits to see this precious life.

Rachel and Adrian's sweet baby boy, Josiah, has bronchiolitis and daughter Susannah has battled a head cold. Josiah did not like the breathing treatments until his Grammy gave him one. (Psst, I'm the Grammy.)

More Waiting

Our family is no stranger to grief, especially the grief of miscarriage. But walking through this valley with my own daughter is heart wrenching. It's usually easy for me to hide from grief by holding a baby, cooking, cleaning, or basically just avoiding it. There are many needs in our busy household that could easily demand my attention. In the moment of tragedy, the busyness comes to a screeching halt. Plans change, schedules rearrange and we grieve.

No matter how hard I want to hide from the pain, the "crushing hand of God" is ever present. The pain of loss feels like my heart is physically coming out of my chest. The knowledge that the God who created the Heavens and the earth is the one who holds this precious life is the only comfort. He has held many of our babies and he holds us. There are moments when I wish I could physically feel that hold, but I always know He is the Very Present God.

I know that I cannot bring this baby back, nor would I want to since he has seen the face of God.  I rest in the fact that we will see this baby and others that have gone before. (2 Samuel 12:23)

These pictures were taken for Rachel and Adrian's pregnancy announcements. Now they are reminders of a new life that we have to wait to see.

Happy Third Birthday to Abigail!

 I couldn't choose just one of these! She plays the family princess job very well.

Susannah testing out a present to make sure it worked.

Hannah and Abi

Rachel and Abi - Abigail is free with her hugs and kisses to everyone!

Lydia and Abi

Josiah

Abigail loved the baby doll that the O'Neils made for her.

Abi with all of her best "fwiends"

Sarah and Mary were here, they just missed out on the photos this time.