Children are Savages

Beautiful, adorable, amazing, made in God's image creatures, but they are still savages.

Susannah

Consider the newborn that has just emerged from the womb, the toddler who hasn't had his nap, the older child's eyes rolling... those are just a few ways that reveal the savage heart of a child.

Those little savages are slowly and gently turned into respectable grown adults. But it's a long hard process. Parents must be diligent and seek wisdom.

Going from the mother gently bouncing a crying newborn to the parent patiently listening and advising a young adult is a very long process.

For the parent it involves a laying down of themselves. To be a parent of savages requires diligence. There isn't a day when you can say, "Today I am not a parent, someone else can take care of them." Even though, I have (jokingly, of course) told my children that my parenting button is off after 9:00 pm and that I'm done with them for the night.

Sometimes parents need a break, to recharge, to breathe air that doesn't smell like dirty diapers and sweaty socks. But there is never a time that they can turn off their parenting buttons. If those buttons are paused, they and the children need to know the clear boundaries of where everyone is supposed to be and what they are supposed to be doing.

I can't tell you how many times I've failed his myself. I am praying for wisdom and the strength.

I know God has blessed our home tremendously. I am reminded that without His great mercy and grace, we would be in utter chaos.  I was told years ago that it's impossible to do this job (of parenting) without Christ. How true! Follow Christ first and foremost, He will lead you to parent your little savages.

Adrian and Josiah

Here's a few pictures of some of my favorite "savages" during our short blast of Winter. Rachel and Adrian are doing a great job of raising our grandchildren. What a privilege to be a part of their lives!

Caleb

Do You Feel Peace?

The following was written by a young woman and sent to me to share with others. It's a message that our self-help, feel-good society needs to hear.

A rare view from our living room window recently. 

I have peace. I do not feel peace. I have peace because Jesus lives in me. This does not mean that I always experience peace. I don't. But Jesus is peace and I have Him and He is enough-even when I don't feel peaceful. One day we will experience the feeling of peace, but that day may not be today. I've been told so many times that if you don't "feel a peace about it" then it's not God's will. Or as a true Christian you will feel peaceful even in suffering. Or that if you pray then God will give you a peace that surpasses all understanding. I believe you have hope in the midst of suffering; I believe you have peace (Jesus) but I don't believe that you always feel peace in it. 

Hearing these thing made me feel like a bad Christian or not a Christian at all. What was everyone else doing that I wasn't feeling this peace? I prayed all the time, yet I still felt stress. Then, the pursuit of peacefulness and feeling good became my idol. Finally someone told me, stop worrying about that feeling and just pursue God. Embrace Him no matter how you feel. 

Jesus is the prince of peace. He didn't live in turmoil. But, when Jesus went to die on the cross, I don't think He felt a peace about it. He was sweating blood. He suffered anguish (Luke 22:44). Yet, He obeyed the will of the Father. Sometimes you won't feel a peace. You may be called to give your life away. That doesn't always feel good. I feel like in my job I serve all day long. I love my job, but it doesn't always feel good. It feels exhausting. But I know that the Bible calls me to serve. I will continue to serve regardless the risk and regardless how much peace it brings me. 

So here's my confession. I often don't feel peaceful. But I do know that God has called me as His child and Christ took the punishment for my sins and Christ rose again. Because of this I have the living Jesus alive in me. He is my peace and even if I never feel peaceful, He is enough. 

No doubt you are, or you know a person, who struggles with anxiety or over thinkers or even someone who is really sensitive to all the pain in the world. There are benefits for those people. They are often very compassionate, very aware, servant hearted, and very gentle. However, in my experience, they very rarely feel peace. Sometimes they feel a lot of darkness because they can't stop noticing all the pain. They help people a lot but the pain seeps into their mind and it can be very dark. Know this, it takes one light to break darkness. 

Think of the most compassionate person you know. Compassion is painful and that person may feel a lot of darkness and little peacefulness. You can be that one light to break through their darkness. Show them some of the sensitivity that they have shown you. I have found light in something someone says to me or in a song or in a book. That song or person or book can put me back on track when I start to fall apart. But, no matter how much you care, you are human and you can not be a perfect light. 

Jesus is light and He is a perfect light. That's why I cling so hard to the promise that Jesus lives in me and won't stop living in me no matter how much darkness I allow in. He is light and He is peace and that is enough to give me hope even in my darkest moments. And when God looks at me, He doesn't see my sin. He sees Jesus in all of His perfection. That is what picks me up off the floor after I've been throwing up, gets my weak body showered and takes me to work, allowing me to serve all day. I haven't felt the peace that surpasses all understanding a lot, but I have felt a strength that surpasses understanding very often. Notice what God is doing for you and thank Him for that. Realize what He has done for you and embrace that as being enough. 

All this is not to say that it's okay to be living in darkness and anxiety. It's not. It's painful and no one should. I can't lie to you and give you eight steps to live a stress free. I'm not sure how to make it stop. I've tried everything that people say and there is still often this mental turmoil that I can't shake. There is still a lot of dark times. There are times when it feels like my mind is twisted up and screaming even though there is a smile on my face. I look for any bit of relief I can get in the moment. 

I've kind of stopped pursuing that peaceful feeling. Instead, I've embraced the fact that Jesus is a light in my dark mind and that He offers me hope that one day in heaven there will be no darkness and fullness of peacefulness. In Him, I will wait. I will grow weary, I will be stressed out, I will have panic attacks, I will fall into depression, I will look for relief in sinful places, I will fail. Thankfully, my assurance is not in my abilities but in His strength. Thankfully, "even the dark is light to Him" (Psalm 139:12). I will wait and I will hope in Him regardless how I feel. 

And I will stop condemning myself. If you are a struggling with anxiety, if you feel like a second rate Christian, if you're praying but not feeling peaceful, know this: "God is not disappointed in you. Because what disappointment means is that there are unmet expectations. God had no unmet expectations about you. All the expectations for righteousness and for your debt have been fulfilled in Jesus." (Elyse Fitzpatrick) 

Shhh....

Have you ever noticed the sound that snow makes? We live in a a very noisy world. In our home there is always children talking, balls bouncing, dishes clinking, a washing machine swishing, music blaring, someone running up and down stairs, even the turtle bumping against his tank. 

When I woke up this morning to falling snow and opened the door, it was almost as if it said, "Shhh!" And I quickly shut the door and almost tiptoed to read my Bible. I knew the minute that someone else heard any sound that there would be the noise again. I relish the times in the morning when I'm able to have my quiet time before the house gets moving. Having the gentle reminder when I peeked out this morning to stay quiet was nice. 

The snow flakes were giant today and oh so beautiful.

Since Truett was closed today, some of us went out to breakfast and to visit Rachel and Susannah.

Susannah is always glad to get a squeeze and sneak outside.

Our girly snow "man"

Heart shaped biscuits!

Snowflakes That Stay On My Nose and Eyelashes

These are a few of my favorite things...

Anatomy of a Snow Day

• Wake up to a pretty, smooth, white yard
• Put on the warmest clothes over your pajamas, take pictures
  
• Search for something to slide down the hill in, this year it's a lid from a plastic bin
  
• Come in, drop wet clothes on the floor, eat breakfast, drink hot chocolate, comment how there is no way we could have gone to school
  
• Moan that your fingers are frostbitten
  
• Put on more warm clothes, take more pictures
  
• Come in, drop clothes on the floor, warm up by the fireplace
• Play a family game
• Put on more clothes, spread some out by the fire
• Convince Daddy to slide now
• Come in, drop wet clothes on the floor, moan some more about frostbite
• Eat lunch, and comment about how there is no way we could have gone to school
• Play another game, read
• Get on more clothes and slide in the mud now
• Have chili for supper
  
• Bathe and put exhausted kids to bed
  

Anatomy of the Day After

• Start laundry
• Realize mud stained socks will remind you of a fun, relaxing day

A snow day is the only day of the year you can drink all the hot chocolate you want, play games all day and track mud in the house.
The top picture is Sarah in a yoga position and below is Hannah's rendition of flying.