I Peter 4:13

Beloved, do not be surprised at the fiery trial when it comes upon you to test you, as though something strange were happening to you. But rejoice insofar as you share Christ's sufferings, that you may also rejoice and be glad when his glory is revealed. If you are insulted for the name of Christ, you are blessed, because the Spirit of glory and of God rests upon you. But let none of you suffer as a murderer or a thief or an evildoer or as a meddler. Yet if anyone suffers as a Christian, let him not be ashamed, but let him glorify God in that name. For it is time for judgment to begin at the household of God; and if it begins with us, what will be the outcome for those who do not obey the gospel of God? And

“If the righteous is scarcely saved,

what will become of the ungodly and the sinner?”

Therefore let those who suffer according to God's will entrust their souls to a faithful Creator while doing good.

1 Peter 4:12-19 ESV

God has called each of us to obey Him. As we do, some will not understand that when we say no to them we are actually obeying God. As I put aside my own will for my life (and the will of others) I sense more from God than ever.  God has called each of us to do some very specific things. The basic things in life are clear -

• Love the Lord your God with all your heart
• Love your neighbor as yourself
• The Ten Commandments

But the specific things may not be so easy to see. That's when the whole Scripture is important. Read God's Word, pray without ceasing, get godly counsel, then act. When you act on what you know to be the right thing to do, you may be ridiculed, berated or even despised. Do not be surprised, but rejoice. This isn't third world suffering such as beheadings, loss of job or family, but it is a type of suffering. You are suffering according to God's will while you are doing good.

What Is My Joy in Life?

Last Fall, our family was offered three tickets to the Georgia football game. If you know us remotely well you'd know that was awesome. There was excitement and lots of questions. Who would go was at the top of the list?

The statement- "I haven't done anything 'fun' in over six weeks," hit me wrong. I was mad and wanted to let everyone know. I turned it back to myself- When have I done anything fun? What do I even do for fun? If I have a free moment, I fill it with cleaning, cooking or doing what someone else wants. Wah, wah, wah...

The path of self pity seemed easy to take. Woe is me. All I ever do is work.

Then I started trying to think about what I would do if someone wanted me to do something just for fun. I had no ideas. When I get free time, I will clean, do some extra cooking, maybe even read. Then I realized that I like to do those things. I like to see the house clean or try new recipes. 

My friend, Michele, has taught herself to knit. And true to what seems to be her personality, there's no part way knitting. It's the real deal - dyeing her on yarn, knitting her own socks, you know, that kind of stuff. I've even been a little jealous that I can't go learn to knit. But, is that what I would want to do if I could?

I had to ask myself some hard questions about all of this. Is my joy in life hobbies, going places, learning new things, entertaining myself or relaxing? My joy in life must be Christ! I like serving others, I like being a wife and mom. I'm glad He called me to this life. (Please note, that I'm not saying if you don't serve others all the time you aren't serving Christ.)

At the retreat last week, another pastor's wife asked me what do I do for myself, you know, "me time". I started trying to grab for something, anything that I could tell her. I felt like I needed to report to her some great thing that I do for myself. I couldn't think of one thing. And I'm okay with that. I like to read some, cook some, clean some and sleep a little.

I can joyfully serve Christ doing things that I like to do.

While I was working on this post, Lydia was reordering her bedroom that she shares with Abigail. She was making it easier for Abigail to get to her toys. Mary rearranged her own room last week. 

How Am I Cultivating "The Village"?

Some would say that I'm growing my own village. We have always told the girls jokingly that when they get married they must marry a godly man that always wants to live near us. As parents, we want our children to live in the same house with us forever, or at least stay very close. It's kind of a joke, but it may not be all bad.

If Rachel hadn't lived so close to us, what would she have done the day she was pregnant and constantly vomiting, the septic system backed up all over her house, at the moment that Adrian couldn't possibly leave work? She spent the day on our sofa while we took care of the dirty business. We did it joyfully, not because I thought Adrian would bring home flowers (which he did), but because we love her and we wanted to help her.

Having daughters, I have always taught them to help at home. They can all cook, clean and take care of babies. I was very purposeful in teaching these things for two reasons. One reason is so that they could help others and the other reason was because I needed help.  My marriage needed that and I needed that. It was a glorious day when Ray and I could leave the house together without children. They are fully capable and even cheerful about taking care of things here when I need for them to. I have often said that I don't know how I got Rachel raised without her help.

Now, I'm reaping the rewards of teaching them to care for a home, but I hope others will too. There have been a few times when they have gone to a family member's or friend's house to help out, but not often enough. I can see firsthand of how helpful my older girls are to me and I want them to do the same for others.

When we see life getting hard for a friend we should step in and help. Wash her dishes so she can sit down to feed her baby with joy. Sit with her children while she goes to the grocery store alone. Prepare her a meal to serve at her home when she needs it. That's all part of living in a "village".

While Rachel is pregnant with her second child and working on a house, she needs extra help again. We are part of the "village" that she lives in. Our community is our family and church. So many times we have been at their new house and she would mention someone's name that had been over to help for a few hours. What a sweet reward to "living in a village."

Don't you love the story about Solomon asking the people to give of their belongings to build the temple and they gave so freely that he had to ask them to stop giving.

A pastor friend just recently died after a brain tumor. The family was so blessed by meals coming every day that his wife had to ask the meals to slow down, the people were giving too much. In her grief, the community wanted to pour their love on her and surround her with help.

I have to ask myself, have I given so much of myself that someone would consider asking me to stop? That's part of being in the village.

Sure you're going to come across someone that always wants your help. They keep asking and asking, but never seem to return the favors. There's a scripture about that too.

But what I want is for my family to be helping the body of believers that God has placed us in and for them to help me. That's the village that I really want to live in.

The Body of Christ

I am often amazed at the body of Christ, also known as, the church. Being a pastor's wife, I hear a lot of the needs that arise. I see what my husband does and get to hear of what others have done to help or serve. Just in the past month, I know of times when someone in our church body did things for others that were never publicly recognized. These aren't people assigned to do jobs, they just took it upon themselves to meet a need because they love Christ and His church, our church.
No one knew about -

• The men who did home repairs for a young family 
• Hours of babysitting for a new mother
• Meals, clothes, and instruction for an unwed mother of a newborn
• Hours of sitting at a jail
• Uncalculated amount of money to meet the needs of a family in trouble 
• Hours of mentoring done for a woman no one knows
• Cleaning done on the church building 
• Buying of supplies for the building

When our congregation sings our fellowship song at the end of each service, I really feel its truth.

One heart, one spirit, one voice to praise you,

We are the body of Christ.

One goal, one vision, to see you exalted

We are the body of Christ.

And to this we give our lives 

To see you glorified.

 One heart, one spirit, one voice to praise you,

We are the body of Christ.

by Scott Wesley Brown and David Hampton

So the next time I'm tempted to think nothing great is happening, I'll open my heart and look around and listen to our fellowship at Grace Community Church.

Sarah Goes to Portland

Sarah's first short term mission trip seemed to be a great experience for her. Here is a note from her:

"Throughout the week we helped a church plant in Clackamas, Oregon. On Sunday morning, we helped them set up church and that night we went to worship at a Hispanic church's first ever service in Vancouver, Washington. Monday through Thursday we had basketball camp every morning. We taught them different skills in each station and at the end of the day they learned the gospel. Two thirds of the kids there were not in a church and I'm very thankful to have been a part of those kids hearing the gospel. In the afternoons we canvassed different areas of Portland and took notes on the culture and lifestyle of those who lived there. This is part of the ground work being done to prepare for more permanent missionaries or church planters that will come to live there. In the afternoons we did a lot of praying for the lost in the city. It is a little overwhelming when you actually see how blind the people living there are. When I asked one lady at a bakery what she thought of the "spiritual climate" in her area she said she hadn't grown up in a religious household and that she didn't really know what she thought- she'd never really thought about it. The way she talked was completely foreign to me... she didn't care at all. Everyone I've ever talked to about spiritual things either were clearly against it or were professing Christians. She could care less either way. I saw how dead in her sin she was and it struck me that I was once that way. It made me so thankful for the Lord softening my heart. Otherwise, I would still be just like her- blind and dead in sin. I am still praying for Portland and Trinity Church there. It's a lost place in serious need of the gospel."

Some highlighted pictures from a wonderful trip.

Sarah's first ever plane trip.

She fell in love with some sweet little girls.

White water rafting was so much fun.

The whole group out to eat.

Multnomah Falls and the mountains in the western US were quite impressive to Sarah.

Sarah lead a ball handling station.

Friendship are forged when you spend hours together for the gospel.

It's the thought that counts, right? Wrong!

Consider our lunch conversation:

Sarah - "If everyone would be considerate and load their own dishes after every meal, dishes would be so easy." 

Me - "Imagine what our house would look like if everyone were considerate in every room. Speaking of chores, Mary did you change the laundry?" 

Mary - "Ohh noo! I forgot, I was going to, I told Lydia to watch Abigail while I went to do it.....and ..... I never did it. But I thought about it, it's the thought that counts, right?" 

Me - "That thought didn't get the laundry changed." 

Hannah - "No. This guy told me that the other day, he drove by me at school and thought about picking me up. Then he said, 'it's the thought that counts, right?' I told him, 'No, because I still had to walk up the long hill.'"

So if you think about doing something, do it. (You know that I mean good and reasonable things. I'm not advocating drugs, crime or other sin.) It doesn't encourage my friend if all I ever do is think about calling her, I need to actually call.  If all you ever do is think, them you've done nothing.

Overwhelmed

While driving in the car with Hannah, I made a few phone calls to check on some people. After talking to the third person, I realized that Hannah was crying. She was overwhelmed at the sorrow and distress that so many are in right now. We talked about how last year at this time we were in their place and God gave us the grace to get through. He was faithful to us and He will be faithful to them. He provided so many people to help us and gave us the strength to not give up.

So - for the mom of five with a newborn who can't seem to get out of her house until four in the afternoon, or the family who lost their beloved grandfather and uncle, or the mom who is unable to move because of a bad neck while her husband works out of town - God is faithful! He will give you the grace to see this through. And... as much as possible, I will be delivering chicken soup.....

Servant Hearts

This Summer Rachel is working on the head staff of Camp Westminster and Hannah is working as a senior counselor there. They will spend most of their Summer working with children who come to the camp in Conyers. We will get to see them for a few hours every weekend, but most of the time they will be working long hours in the heat. They'll have a lot of opportunities to teach Bible studies, share the gospel and be with children ages six to fifteen.

Rachel left for camp in late May to get ready for the staff to come in later. For several weeks she had been working hard to make up extra meals for the freezer for us to pull out on the days that I don't feel good, and making sure as much cleaning was done before she left. After she left, Hannah spent several days doing very much the same thing - cleaning, cooking, and trying to make things as easy as possible for me. Then she left to work at camp with Rachel. Now, Sarah is home, finally finished with school and is spending most mornings trying to do the heavy work of the cleaning to keep me from having to do too much. Last weekend, Sarah went to a friend's house and I was at home with Mary and Lydia. I was getting stressed (sinfully anxious) because I had to do several things before leaving for the day. Mary jumped up and got busy helping out, without me asking. Now that I am feeling much better than the first few months of pregnancy, I am able to get off the couch and do most of my normal work. But I am easily tired out and still need the girls' help. I am so thankful for their servants' hearts. Not only have they become my friends, but they have servants' hearts that want to help.

Basketball is Done

- for Hannah. We go to practice everyday, go to every game, we get attached to the girls on the team, and we are sad to see the season end. But now basketball is completely finished for Hannah since she graduates this year. She has had a great year making new friends and enjoying being with her team. She's always made friends easily and this year was no exception when she joined this team in her senior year of high school. The girls are talented but small so they have had to work hard for their wins. Her last game was at the state tournament where her team lost in the first game. It was a disappointing loss to a team that they could have usually beaten. We had a great time with the team eating out, hanging out and serving others. They went to a children's daycare for very sick children and played with the kids there.

The pictures are of Hannah praying with the starters on the court just before the game (she's #3), with her team and trophy, and driving on an opponent with her game face on. (She isn't afraid of playing against anyone.)

Surgery

With all of the excitement of yesterday we have that much calmness today. Rachel had surgery on her right foot today to fix a wayward bunion and the other girls had the living room filled with cards and well wishes. The late afternoon was spent trying to keep Lydia quiet until time for church. The surgery went great and she is feeling groggy, but okay. Now she has to learn to be patient with us as we learn how to take care of her and get her whatever she needs when she needs it. I am remembering last year when I broke my ankle and just wished everyone could read my mind and know what I needed.

Launching Arrows

Ray often uses the illustration of children being arrows in our quiver while teaching on the family. The archer (parent) takes those arrows (children) and polishes, shapes and shines them until they are straight and ready to be launched. Sometimes they are launched permanently. Often times the archer shoots the arrows out on a practice run. Yesterday we launched our first arrow. Rachel went to Honduras for a mission trip where she hopes to get to work in many different areas of ministry. The family she will be staying with are doctors at a mission hospital and will be watching over her while she is there. In fact the family's oldest daughter is Rachel's violin teacher, part of our church and flew with her to Honduras. Though Rachel will be gone for a month it seems like such a huge thing. She will be with someone all the time and under the care of a family who has five daughters of their own. Yet I know this is a huge step in independence for her. Our prayer is that she will grow more dependant on God and not herself. She looks forward to the day in which she will be a wife and mother, but in the meantime, there are many opportunities for her to serve the Lord and her parents.


Here is the first of many (I hope) updates from her:


"Everyone slept in today, so we are just getting started. It is so hot here. You would like to sleep here because lizards crawl all over the walls all the time. Animals run free-I woke up at four to the sound of very loud cows and a rooster. There are ponies all in the road, and on the interstate they are just tied to the ground inches from the road. Later this morning, Natalie is going to take me on a tour of the hospital and other places, I'll go meet people and see what I will be doing. After that, there is a Spanish class that meets 3 days a week, so I'll go to that if I can. On Friday's a lady has a ministry to children who live at the dump in the city, I'm planning on going with her."

Our Valentine

Tradition reigned again this Valentine's Day. Every year since Ray and I have known each other, we have celebrated Valentine's Day the same way with very little variation. Ray cooks a special meal of steak and baked potatoes, I decorate the table with red and pink, we light candles and have soft music. Since we've had children we include them even if we can't always have our dinner on the fourteenth of February. (There was the year he and his friend David went to a men's conference, but we won't mention that again.) Rachel says that when she gets married she isn't going to share Valentine's Day with her kids. I just tell her to bring them to me. I want our children to learn what real love is.
As my earthly defender, protector, provider and comforter Ray sets the example for the the girls of what a good husband looks like. On birthdays and other special occasions he takes each daughter out on a date. And on Valentine's he gives chocolate and writes poems for them. Our prayer is that the girls will see what true love is and how love behaves every day. Our world gives ungodly examples of what love looks like. We as parents need to model the right way and point it out to our children. Every once in a while we will see a little evidence that something is sinking in. The girls always hand make cards for their sisters, Ray and me. The cards are so creative and fun and this year several cards even included poems. My favorite was the card I received with a certificate to clean out the turtle tank for me. I think someone is learning the gift of service to others and how it acts.