Monday, July 28, 2014

Homeschool Changes

For about six or so years, I haven't done a lot of homeschool prep. It took little time to clean out the old books and replace with the next thing we would do. In comparison to now, it had been easy. We had been on auto-pilot for so long, that when I thought we needed to make a change I didn't realized the implications.

I've never had an unlimited homeschool budget, and have pretty much used what I was able to get my hands on at a good price. I would figure out how to make it work for my family. God has been so gracious to us to allow so many people to basically give us their left overs. We have used lots of textbooks, workbooks, whole book curriculum, the internet and the library.

For many reasons, I thought we needed to make some changes this year. So change came... and all that comes with it.

I have felt like a first time homeschool mom again, one night even reduced to tears. Moms have a lot of responsibilities, all moms. My situation is not that unique, but it is still MY situation and I must deal with it in a godly manner.

Recently, I was embarrassed at the condition of my house while I sat in the dining room with the two other homeschool moms to discuss our plans for the upcoming year. I was overwhelmed at the pile of dishes, the stacks of laundry, toys scattered everywhere, lack of food cooked. One of the girls came in grieved over something on her heart and I got even more overwhelmed. Allowing self-pity to creep in, I sinned.

I have felt like a failure, like I was alone in this mess, and that it was a bad idea to make the changes that I was making. I have been stretched. I want things to stay the same, I don't want to change any more.

Too late. I've spent more money than I thought I would need to and have spent too many hours planning.

I'm sure everything will turn out great. The whole school year will be harder, but over all, the girls will get a better education.  With more structure, my free style girl will learn a little more discipline...hopefully. With a better schedule, my structured girl will know what to expect and not freak out when she doesn't know what's coming...hopefully. And everyone will still have the "love of learning" that I pray for so often...hopefully.


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